How to get Unstuck – FAST!

Everything I do is about helping people get unstuck. Why? Even though I have spent most of my life researching, teaching, and applying the principles of empowerment, I’m very human and imperfect and have found myself stuck numerous times. And it’s a crappy place to be. Anxiety, self-doubt, regret, shame, aloneness, and hopelessness kick in like a whirlwind from Hell.

So, when I teach the martial art of Aikido, I show students how to relax and use their intrinsic strength to deal with wrist grabs, strikes, choke attacks, etc. Their natural reaction is to freeze up, give up, and get stuck. But it’s only an illusion that they have no choices—very cool stuff.

When I run my empowerment workshops, participants are there because they feel disempowered and want to regain control. Stuck.

My coaching clients are often dealing with overusing drugs, alcohol, or behaviors (gambling, food, sex, porn, shopping), which have put them in a position of feeling trapped. They think they don’t know how to move forward.

With all three modalities that I use to pass these principles of empowerment on to others, the people I’m working with always have two things in common. First, they believe they are stuck, trapped, and disempowered, with few or no choices.

Second, they think they need outside help to find their way again - that they don’t have the strength, internal resources, ability, or skills to change their circumstances. This is a complete and total lie that someone or something has taught them.

Let me share the “secret” of getting out of this undesirable position.

You HAVE to remember who the f*ck you are! Stop focusing on why you’re stuck, how you’re stuck, and what you did or didn’t do in the past to get you there. You do NOT need to understand every problem's dimension to initialize the solution. And the solution is this: Rediscover yourself. I don’t mean in some new age, lovey-dovey, butterflies and rainbows way. Just remember what gets you excited, what you lose time doing, and what you always wanted to try or learn. What do people always tell you you’re great at? What did you love doing when you were 10 years old? What things would you be doing if you weren’t stuck in the shitty relationship, job, or overusing situation you are in?

This isn’t about finding your purpose or passion (although it may lead to that). It’s about remembering the little, unique things that make you feel like you. The sh*t that gets your motor running. The things that wake you up and gives you energy. The things (good things) that used to keep you awake at night.

Once you determine what some of these things are, guess what? You start f*cking doing them! Suddenly, you’re not the guy who overuses alcohol; you’re the guy who is learning how to play the drums. You’re no longer the gal who hates her miserable job; you’re the lady teaching yoga part-time. You’re not the person who is in a dried-up, crappy relationship; you’re the person thinking of ways to make the world better by volunteering at the local SPCA.

And “magically,” you start moving away from your stuckness and towards who you forgot you always were in the first place. Excitement returns, hope is back, and you feel a new sense of identity, direction, and control very quickly. It was always there; you just forgot.

I have seen this work with my students, coaching clients, and myself. It’s powerful, simple and quick. I know it works.

Give it a try, and please don’t hesitate to share the exciting new things you are doing with me!