The BENEFITS of going through really, really, f*cked up shit

Wait! What? There are benefits?

Absolutely.

Before you accuse me of being crazier than I might actually be, let me explain what I’m NOT saying.

First, I do not believe in “everything happens for a reason.” But, I DO think you can choose to make the best out of events.

I’m also not a believer in the bizarre notion that someone has to hit “rock bottom” before they decide to make some positive changes.

Lastly, I’m not suggesting that whatever you went through wasn’t horrible, painful, offensive, unfair, or traumatizing. I would NEVER make light of how catastrophically scarring events like physical/emotional/sexual abuse, loss of a loved one, domestic violence, serious illness, prison stays, war, bullying, severe poverty, etc. can be. Christ, if you know me, the people who have gone through these things are my brethren, and I feel more love and kinship for them than anyone else.

What I AM saying is that those of us that endured really f*cked up shit, whether self-inflicted or from external people or events, have several benefits that commonly come out of it. Whether we want them or not.

One note. Most everything I blog/post about has, at its core, years of research and cutting-edge proof either by me or others. However, this post is solely based on my experience and opinion.

SO – IF YOU HAVE GONE THROUGH SOME REALLY, REALLY F*CKED UP SHIT YOU ARE PROBABLY:

1. More resilient than most. You have somehow figured out a way to survive and move on.

2. Less judgmental. You have felt like a black sheep or misfit and defend those who feel the same.

3. More empathetic. You KNOW what it is like to hurt. To be out of control. To be lost.

4. Tougher. You know that you can survive almost anything. If you’re still around after whatever happened to you, the little bullsh*t in life is just that. Little bullsh*t.

5. More appreciative of the good stuff because you are well aware of the bad stuff.

6. More welcoming and accepting of those people that the rest of society has given up on.

7. Someone who wants…no, needs, to give back to others.

8. Someone with a strong passion for making the world less painful.

9. (A strange one) Someone who firmly believes in the power of love.

10. Someone who despises injustice to your core.