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There’s a story we tell about domestic violence. It sounds like this: There’s a victim. There’s an abuser. There’s a crisis. And the system steps in to help. Hotlines. Shelters. Protection orders. Counseling. Advocacy. And to be clear — these things matter. A lot. They save lives. But they’re not the whole picture. Not even close. WHERE THE SYSTEM FOCUSES The domestic violence system — what most people think of as shelters, advocacy, and support services — is built around one

I’ve been noticing something lately that doesn’t quite make sense to me. And I think part of it is because my dad died this year… And my mom is on her way. So death isn’t some abstract idea right now. It’s… right here. When I’m sitting alone, in my head, thinking about it— Not existing. Just… gone. It scares the hell out of me. Like a deep, almost panicky kind of fear. But here’s the part I can’t reconcile. If I picture a real situation— A client of mine in danger. Someone tr