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There’s a story we tell about domestic violence. It sounds like this: There’s a victim. There’s an abuser. There’s a crisis. And the system steps in to help. Hotlines. Shelters. Protection orders. Counseling. Advocacy. And to be clear — these things matter. A lot. They save lives. But they’re not the whole picture. Not even close. WHERE THE SYSTEM FOCUSES The domestic violence system — what most people think of as shelters, advocacy, and support services — is built around one